The Most Pathetic Job Ever?

Right after I went to FL last I tweeted @United about some service issues.

In any case, right after, someone called me from an unlisted web #, like Skype, and then harassed me, like I was a jerk for tweeting them - and implied it was United customer service.

And then randomly MONTHS later, tonight, someone just did the same thing! Got called a pompous asshole. Which is weird coming from a total stranger. How did they know? I try to keep it a secret until people know me better.

So my question is this: how does one get paid pranking people via the Internet in an unfunny way? What kind of sad little resume do they have to quality for that job? And, how many minutes does it take them to cry themselves to sleep at night?

My Problems with Goodnight Moon

Reading children's books now for obvious reasons, and they raise all sorts of questions I never had back in the day. Like, in Goodnight Moon, why is there a telephone in the little kid's room? Why the heck is there a little mouse running around? Shouldn't the old lady - or the kittens - do something about that? Why is there a random red balloon just chillin' there? And why are they leaving the bowl of mush out overnight? What kind of awful house is this?

9 Awful Things You Didn't Know Happened on Valentine's Day

As a marketer, I understand the need for more holidays. As a human being, I'm not the biggest fan of Valentine's Day. After all, why not be nice to someone you love every day?

If you're a fellow Valentine's Day hater, here's a fun list of the worst things to happen on February 14th (thanks Wikipedia for the help):

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  1. Back in 1349, several hundred Jews were burned to death by mobs. The remainder of their population is forcibly removed from the city of Strasbourg. Even if you're a religious jew not celebrating Valentine's Day, a murderous mob will still ruin your day.
  2. In 1891, the American war hero William Tecumseh Sherman died. 
  3. V'Day, 2003: Dolly, the Scottish cloned sheep, died. She was just 7. And cloned. Which is weird.
  4. The Saint Valentine's Day Massacre took place in 1929 where, instead of a nice box of chocolates, seven people were murdered in Chicago, largely as an act of retribution by Al Capone
  5. The "Stardust Disaster" took place in 1981, when a fire in a Dublin nightclub killed 48 people. Which, honestly, is not so romantic.
  6. On this day in 1913, Jimmy Hoffa, the  union leader and mobster responsible for oodles of organized crime, is born.
  7. Valentine's Day, 1989: Iranian leader Ruhollah Khomeini issued a Fatwa that encouraged Muslims to kill Salman Rushdie (author of The Satanic Verses).
  8. Lebanese self-made billionaire and business tycoon Rafik Hariri is killed on this day in 2005 - along with 21 others - when a massive amount of explosives are detonated near the St. George Hotel in Beirut.
  9. In 1979, Kabul-based militants kidnap Adolph Dubs, the American ambassador to Afghanistan. He is later killed in a gunfight. Fun stuff.

So...happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

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